Two Grandfathers; two approaches

She was quietly sitting there, watching her daughter taking part in the parade at school held on the occasion of "Grandparents Day". There were about 50 children in the parade and there were parents as well as grandparents. The parade concluded and all visitors moved to the area serving refreshments. We were on the same table now, sharing cup cakes and fruits. "Did your grandparents also attend such an event when you were in school?", I asked.

She was surprised at the question, but replied with a smile. "There was no celebration of "Grandparents day" in the days when I was in school", she said. After a moment she added, "I wish there was one".

"Do you have any memories of your Grandfather?" was my next question.

"Oh, I have many fond memories of both my granddads", she replied enthusiastically.

"Can you recall any of them?", I asked. What she recalled is in her own words.

*****

My maternal grandfather was a well known writer and social worker. He was associated with many organisations working at different levels. He would be busy, attending some event or the other every day. Whenever he was at home, there would a number of visitors. When we visited his house and he was free from all other activities, he had time for us, his grandchildren. He appeared very strict in his dealings with others and initially we were not very free with him. As we started growing up, we understood him better. He always dressed in white and was simple in his habits. He was also a very good speaker. When he spoke in the meetings and functions, there would be pin drop silence. As kids we did not understand what all he spoke, but it made us feel happy. His way of life taught us discipline in our daily lives. Towards the latter part of our association with him, we were more relaxed and played with him. 

He was a good cards player and allowed us to play with him. Children being associated with a card game was not liked in those days, but his view was different. He was firm in his conviction that any game on its own is not bad at all. It becomes bad only when betting and wagers were allowed to creep in. He held a view that playing cards sharpens one's brain and is good for growing children. Rules to be followed during the game were announced at the beginning and we were taught to follow the rules strictly. It was difficult to win while playing with him. But occasionally we won a game and it made us very happy. We later realised that at times he would deliberately let go a card needed by us to enable us to win a game. 

My paternal grandfather was a teacher and lived in a distant place. We saw him when we visited his place or when he visited us. He was a master storyteller and had a story for every occasion. There was never a dull moment when he was around. He had a joke or anecdote for all seasons. He was comfortable with any age group. Once I cooked a meal and served him. I wanted to know how he felt about it. I knew it was not like what my mother or my grandmother cooked. He silently had the meal and did not say anything. I was excited and asked him about his assessment of my cooking. "You have passed in first class. I gave you 60 per cent marks", he said. "When will I get more marks?", I asked. "You keep on improving and you will get higher marks", he said. With the urge to get better marks I took more interest in cooking. Once he gave me 90 marks and I was very happy. "Grandpa, when will I get hundred per cent?", I asked. " The maximum you get is 90 percent. Your mother gets 95 per cent.  Full marks are only for your grandmother!", he said smilingly.  

He taught me some popular games played in the villages. One of them was "HuliGhatta" or "Tiger and the goats". There were four tigers and goats used in the game. The goats have to restrict the movement of tigers to win. Tiger has to jump and kill goats to win. He would always win, irrespective of whether we chose to be tigers or goats. Once I told him that my other grandfather let go cards to enable us to win. "I want you to win on your own without any outside support. With practice you will win one day against me as well. Concentrate and practice hard. You will succeed", he said. He added mischievously, "If I let you win once, it will be easy for you thereafter. Once you start winning, you will never play with me!" 

*****

"Which of the two approaches was better, allowing you to win occasionally or making you win on your own?", I asked.

She thought for a moment and replied. "I feel both approaches were good in their own way. One believed in a small dose of encouragement to motivate to do better. The other approach taught that nothing came easy and one has to strive hard to achieve anything in life. I have learnt from both approaches and use it alternately to suit the occasions."

As we moved into the parking lot to board our respective cars, she looked back and said, "The two approaches were the two faces of the same coin. Weren't they?"

Instead of replying her question, I smiled and said: "Your grandson or granddaughter may give you full marks for cooking!"

I tend to agree with her view that both approaches of the grandfathers were two faces of the same coin.  Do you?   

GrandFather and GrandSon

Sometime back I wrote a blog titled  "Mother-in-law and Daughter-in-law" (Click here to read it).  The blog contained a reference to Goddess of Wealth Lakshmi (Mother-in-law) and Goddess of Knowledge Saraswati (Daughter-in-law).  A friend read it last week and asked me whether I have a story for Father-in-law and Son-in-law.  Why not?  Our epics have many such Father-in-law and Son-in-law stories.  The story of Lord Shiva and Daksha Prajapati is one such.  There are many.  But today it is the story of Grandfather and Grandson.

One school of thought believes that Lord Vishnu is one who does not have a beginning, middle or end.  Aadimadhyaantarahita.  He was there for ever and he is and will be there for ever.  After the end of the previous world (pralaya) when the new world was to be created, he gave birth to Lord Brahma.  Brahma was born through the navel of Lord Vishnu.  Lord Shiva was Lord Brahma's Maanasaputra, born by his will.  It is to be clearly understood that one was never born and the other two were born without intervention of females.  Later on through a family partition deed, which is neither recorded nor registered, these three Lords apportioned among themselves the three main portfolios of managing this world.  Son (Brahma) kept the portfolio of Creation of the world (Srushti).  Grandfather (Vishnu) kept the portfolio of Maintenance (Stithi).  Grandson (Shiva) got the portfolio of Destruction (Laya).  Creation is a continuous process and Brahma is always busy to keep the assembly line flowing regularly.  Maintenance also is a continuous process, but just as offices work better when the boss is away, it generally takes care of itself leaving ample time for Vishnu for a lot of other activities.  Destruction is basically a one time job except for the occasional exceptions.  This leaves a lot of spare time for Shiva which he spends mostly in penance and dancing.

In due course of time there probably was a friction in the family as all the power was concentrated between Grandfather, Son and Grandson.  In order to maintain domestic peace, by another unwritten and unregistered family partition deed, three more portfolios were created; portfolio of Wealth was given to Grandmother Lakshmi, portfolio of Knowledge was handed over to Mother Saraswati with Grand daughter-in-law Parvati getting the portfolio of Strength (Shakti).  Both Lakshmi and Saraswati complained to Vishnu and Brahma respectively that Parvati had walked away with the "Powerful Power (strength) portfolio".  Vishnu placated Lakshmi by telling her that real power lay with money and hence "Money was Power".  Similarly, Brahma placated Saraswati by telling her that "Knowledge is Power".  These expressions are so used and often since then.  This somewhat restored a semblance of an order in the heavenly household and things appear to run smoothly thereafter.  The practice of generations of men and women from influential families fighting and concentrating power among themselves actually started here.  Our politicians are only following this golden path.  We unnecessarily blame them for dynastic politics without caring to know the real source of such a state of affairs.

One of the significant and major events of celestial relations was the churning of the sea of milk (Ksheerasamudra) and realising the Nectar (Amrutha).  The sea of milk was to be churned and the Mountain of Mandara (Mandara parvata) was chosen as the churning stone as no churning stick of comparable size was available, to accommodate the 330 million Devas (Angels) and an equally big but unknown number of Demons (Asuras) on the other side.  The number of Asuras was never known because they did not stand in a line and never allowed to be counted systematically.  Their varying sizes probably added to the problem.  No rope of requisite length could be found and hence the multi-headed serpent Aadishesha was chosen as the churning rope.  The angels tempted their cousins demons to show their courage by holding the head-side of the serpent and they themselves safely took the tail side.  During the churning, poisonous Haalahala was the first byproduct.  In order to save the world from the noxious fumes of the poison, Lord Shiva drank the entire quantity of poison.  We can say single handed, though he might have used both hands to hold the vessel of poison.  In order to ensure that there is no much damage to him, the poison was stopped in his neck itself and prevented it from going to his stomach.  Thus  Lord Shiva became Neelakantha, the one with the blue neck. Moon was another byproduct of churning and he was kept on Lord Shiva's head for cooling effect and he thus became Chandramouli, the one with moon on his head.  He saved the world but sat dazed in a corner due the effect of the poison.  Or he possibly sat in penance, one never knows clearly.  This occasion of his saving the world is celebrated as "Mahashivaratri" every year.  Vaishnavites celebrate the event as a festival with choicest dishes to eat.  Shaivites spend the day fasting and praying for Lord Shiva.  Churning went on and many other byproducts emerged; Kamadhenu (celestial cow), Kalpavruksha (Divine tree), heavenly horse Ucchaisravas, heavenly elephant Airavata and Mother Lakshmi herself.  Captain of the Deva's team, Devendra,  kept most of them for the benefit of his team.  Lakshmi was the first woman on heaven or earth to use her right to choose her husband and she chose Vishnu.  And finally nectar (Amrutha) arrived.

There was a commotion and everybody ran after the celestial bowl of the nectar.  In order to restore some order and ensure equitable distribution of nectar, whatever it may mean, Lord Vishnu took the shape of a sixteen year old girl called Mohini.  All our epics describe Lord Vishnu is very handsome.  After all he is the father of Manmatha, the Cupid, and therefore even better than the cupid himself.  He is often refereed as "Saakshat Manmatha Manmatha", meaning he is the Cupid for even Cupid!  He is attractive even to men, forget the women folk.  Hence referred to as "Pumsaam Mohanaroopaya".  His womanly form was no less beautiful and there was never and there will never be another like her, the Mohini.  The name itself attracts one's mind.  Less said the better about the physical form itself.  Mohini mesmerized everyone and ensured fair distribution to Deva's team and broke into two one demon who wrongly entered the Queue and created Rahu and Ketu, thus making way for the eclipses.  The demons are still waiting for their share of nectar.

When everyone was enjoying the divine beauty of Mohini and some lucky ones got the nectar, Lord Shiva was sitting in a corner dazed due to the effect of the poison.  Shiva himself is a handsome person and the one who actually burnt down the Cupid (Manmatha Dahana), when the careless cupid tried to disturb his penance, though for a very good cause and as per the strict order of his higher authorities.  Many years later Lord Shiva wanted to see the beautiful form of Mohini again, in order to appreciate her beauty in peaceful times.  He decided to meet Vishnu and seek his assuming the Mohini form for a second time, exclusively for his benefit.  He was confident that his wish will be fulfilled as no Grandfather will decline a polite request by his Grandson.  He went all the way from his abode, Kailasa, to Vishnu's headquarters, Vaikuntha.  He was received by his Grandmother, Lakshmi and given some refreshments like Chakkali, Kodubale, Rave Vunde etc., followed by a full tumbler of Badam Milk as she had no shortage of milk, being a resident of the milky ocean (Ksheerasamudra).  When the request for a second edition of the Mohini form was made by Shiva, Vishnu was reluctant.  He had to accept the persistent pleas of Shiva, and more so, could not say no to the recommendation of his wife Lakshmi.  Who wants to disturb one's own domestic peace!  Vishnu fixed an auspicious date and advised Shiva to come to the celestial garden (Nandanavana) at sunrise on the appointed date.  Lord Shiva was very happy at the success of his mission, went back to Kailasa and started counting the days before the arrival of the appointed date.  Today's boys need not feel bad for waiting for a date.  They have illustrious predecessors.

Shiva arrived in the garden at sunrise on the appointed day.  It was a divine morning of a divine day in the divine garden.  Everything was wonderful at that moment.  As he entered the garden through the main gate he saw a beautiful girl, all of sixteen years, standing in front of a bush plucking flowers.  Shiva had never seen such a beautiful girl in all his life.  He forgot all about his grandfather and Mohini.  Even the strongest of the men who burnt down the Cupid himself could not resist the beauty of the girl.  He went near her and caught her "Pallu" (Seragu), the open end of the saree.  The girl turned, faced Shiva, smiled and allowed him one long glimpse.  That was it.  Next moment the girl had vanished and in her place Lord Vishnu was standing with all his four hands and his Shanka (Conch), Chakra (Sudarshana), Gada (Kowmodaki) and all.  Lord Shiva realised that he was looking at Mohini all along and bowed down with a tinge of shame mixed admiration.

The last two paragraphs is a summary of a Saint Sripadaraja's song (Devaranaama).  Other background paragraphs leading to them are my interpretation.  My revered mother used to sing this song on every Monday.  It is a beautiful account of a humorous tale in a song form.  I would wait for the song every Monday and my mother never disappointed me.  She is no more with us, but the record of her singing is often playing in the mind. 

Best Roti I ever had.....

This happened around the time "Coconut Trees Criminal Case" was going on. I was about nine years old. My grandfather P Nanjappa was living by himself in our village. His wife had died when he was still in his thirties and he lived a hermit's life thereafter. His three sons lived elsewhere as per the demands of their employments. He was an all-rounder and an integral part of the village life. He was a Doctor dispensing Ayurveda medicine to the needy.  He was a general liaison man with the government officials as most of the villagers were illiterate. He was the money lender of last resort. He was a consultant for Agriculture as well as Astrological predictions. He also officiated as the local unofficial judge to settle disputes and counsel the agitated. Never offered his services voluntarily, but did not disappoint anyone who went to him with a problem.

He had retired after serving as a School Master. He had a small pension to lend support to his meager requirements. He had put up a small hut in his own agricultural lands, just outside the village, and a well close by  provided the water for drinking. A small pond in the land was enough for bathing and washing. He grew enough Paddy and Raagi for his year's requirement of cereals. Some Pulses and Groundnuts were also grown as side crops. Vegetables were grown around his hut. He had a cow and calf to meet the requirement of milk, curds, buttermilk, butter and ghee. Firewood was available in nearby forest. He was never known to lock his hut. As they used to say in those days, he had to buy only salt, kerosene and match sticks! He had his own "Charaka" to spin the thread and needed two or three pairs of Khadi dress every year. He did not care for dressing table or cosmetics, but had a small mirror and razor for shaving. He would do all his work himself and never fell sick.  He had a good collection of books for company. He would rise before the Sunrise and retire for the day at Sunset. A small kerosene lantern was kept for emergency. With this life style, he was a contented man and a model of self sufficiency.

He used to occasionally visit us and some times brought agricultural produce with him. I did not have much interaction with him but my elder brothers have fond memories about him. He was a short man and was popularly called "Kulla Nanjappa", meaning Short Nanjappa because of his height. He was never very demonstrative about his affection for us, his grand children. My brothers remember that he would go to the taluk office on the first of every month to collect his pension. After collecting his pension he would visit them and pay their school fee. How the account was settled between him and our father was known only to them. He always had a packet of Peppermints for children during his visits. He always impressed me with his way of talking, especially about "Bhagavadgita" and such other epics. I remember one particular day when one of my aunts was very much depressed about certain events in the family. I happened to be present when he came that day and spoke to her about Lord Krishna for about an hour. The import of his talk was generally that Lord Krishna was misunderstood and criticised by many in his time. But he never bothered about it and went on with his tasks as if nothing happened. At the end of the session my aunt was relieved and told him that her mind was then clear and the worries had left her. Just like Arjuna finally said "करिष्ये वचनं तव", meaning "I will do as you say".

One day he sent a message to my father through someone that he should go to the village and meet his father. I urged my father to take me with him because I wanted to see Grandfather. It was already evening by then and my father reluctantly took me with him.  We reached the village and my father discussed something with him, probably about cropping pattern for the coming  year. My father decided to stay back for the night and we moved to our uncle's big house in the village for supper and night's stay. This uncle, a cousin of my father, was his classmate and childhood friend as well. They had many things to talk over between themselves and I had little knowledge of what all they spoke about.

We left our uncle's house at sunrise as both of us had to go to our schools. On the way to the bus stand we had to pass through our grandfather's hut.  He saw us and beckoned my father to the hut. My father told him that the issues were already finalised the day before and he was in a hurry. Grandfather told him "Ardha galigeli enoo aakaasha beelolla", meaning heavens will not fall in half Ghalige. (Ghalige is a unit of measuring time as per ancient Indian Method, one Ghalige being 24 minutes and two and a half Ghalige making one hour). We sat on the stone bench just outside the hut. Grandfather plucked out some big Muttuga leaves (a type of bush with large leaves, sometimes as big as big plate) from the nearby bush. He had kept the batter ready  and spread the batter on two of them, covered them with the other two leaves and threw them in the oven containing burning charcoal. After three or four minutes he pulled them out with a stick, cleaned and separated the two leaves and two Rotis were ready! (This dish is popularly called Kendada Rotti, and no longer in practice since cooking is done on gas or electricity. However, Tandoori Rotis are made in a similar process, but not actually thrown inside the burning charcoal). He spread the two Rotis (a type of flat bread for those who are not familiar) on another big leaf and added two big balls on them, one of groundnut (peanut) chutney and one of fresh butter. With a smiling face he gave them to me and ordered me to eat. I was looking at my father and waiting whether he would get some too. Granddad smiled and said, "Don't look him. He has had his share in the past. Today it is only for you. Eat them". No need to say I enjoyed the Rotis with the fine home made butter and groundnut chutney. Of course, we were on our way immediately thereafter.

I have had delicious Rotis with so many side dishes several times thereafter, like every one else.  But if I am asked to list the most delicious Rotis today, I would put Granddad's Rotis of that day on top of the list. I did not have another chance for such a pleasant encounter with my grandfather again as he left for his heavenly abode within a year. Now, my father also is not with us but these memories of Dad and Granddad are always there.