He shall carry his own burden

Ramu and Krishna were more friends than cousins. Born as the sons of the two brothers in the same year, they were naturally together most of the times. They lived in the small beautiful town, situate on the banks of the river with fine and clear water flow, with the old dilapidated fort in the background. They went to school together, playing all the way through the mile long distance. Evenings were again spent together playing in the river bed and the trees lined on either banks of the river. What started in the morning walk to the school continued till evening when both were constrained to go to their respective houses, separated by a street.

Those were the days when there was no concept of pre-school education and private schools charging hefty donations. The faithful government schools were the only ones available, except in big cities that had some private schools. A child admitted to the first standard would go on till middle school or high school, depending on his family's value for education. There was a nominal fee to be paid each year and many households found it difficult to pay even that. There used to be only one book for study each year till fourth standard. The only subject to be studied till then was one's mother tongue. Note books were not used till middle school. Slates and chalk was the source for writing practice.

There were no note books but there was homework. The extent of homework was confined to the area on both sides of the slate. Writing down on both sides of the slate was not a big order, but keeping the writing safe till it was shown to the teacher was indeed tough. The regular homework occupied sometime for the students as the writing had to be legible and neat. There could be a beating on the knuckles from the wooden frame of the slate, if the writing was not neat. Of course, no parent would fight the teacher for such blows on their wards. Students generally used the clay slate, though tin slates were available. Tin slates were unbreakable and light, but clay slates were good for writing with chalk pieces.

Krishna had the practice of finishing the homework on the way back from the school. He would take a look on the road ahead and write a word on the slate before taking another look. Thus his homework would be finished by the time he reached home. Ramu was not used to this practice and did his homework only after reaching home, but before proceeding to the evening play on the banks of the river. On a particular day when Krishna called out to Ramu for the evening play, Ramu had not yet finished his homework and needed time to finish it. Krishna became impatient, snatched Ramu's slate and finished the homework and urged Ramu to accompany him for the evening outing. Ramu followed him and they had a good evening games round. They returned after sunset.

Ramu's father had students coming to his house in the evening for tuitions. When Ramu entered the house, all the students were already sitting with their books and slates. Ramu hurriedly joined them and sat down. Krishna was curious to know the reaction of his uncle when he saw Ramu's slate. He stayed near the door expectantly. His uncle checked all the slates and asked for Ramu's now. Ramu was hesitant to show. "Where is your slate, Ramu", his father asked for the second time. Ramu did not respond. His father raised his hand and immediately Ramu handed over the slate. His father recognized that the handwriting was not that of Ramu. "Who wrote this?", his father asked in a stern voice. Ramu looked at the door. His father saw Krishna standing there and beckoned him to come inside the house. Krishna was afraid, but followed instructions.

"Did you write in Ramu's slate?", his father asked. Krishna acknowledged by the shake of the head. A blow landed on his back before anyone realized what was happening. Krishna and Ramu were both in tears. Ramu's mother intervened before another blow could land on Krishna. Both Ramu and Krishna were taken into the kitchen by her. Tuition for others continued and concluded shortly.

"You have beaten Krishna today. His father has never beaten him in his life. If he comes to know of this, he will come to beat you", Ramu's mother told her husband. He had cooled down by this time. He called Krishna and Ramu to sit near him. "Why did you write in Ramu's slate?" asked Ramu's father. "I wanted to help him finish his homework fast", answered Krishna. "Do you think what you did is right?", the uncle asked Krishna. Krishna was in no position to reply. "What is the result of your action, do you understand? You have done your lessons twice whereas Ramu has not done it even once. You may get an extra mark in the examination, but Ramu could fail", he said. 

"What you did is not help. Instead of helping, it will put Ramu into more difficulty. He becomes lazy. Your idea of help is all wrong. You are welcome to help anyone. But help in studies does not mean doing their studies. Helping should be by way of making them do their studies on their own, but not doing their work. Each one should do his own studies, reading and writing. Each one should carry his own burden in life. There are no short cuts. You cannot walk someone's distance. You are too young to understand now, but both of you should remember this. This will help you in your future life", his uncle concluded. Ramu's mother had some sweets ready by this time. The blow Krishna received was somewhat softened now.

Krishna went home but never mentioned this to his parents. He was not prepared for receiving another blow from his father or watch a fight between his father and uncle. Decades later, he still remembers the lesson. Each one shall carry his own burden. There are no short cuts in life.

*****

There are many complaints about malpractices in various examinations. Many students believe that they are helping their fellow students when they allow them to copy from their answer books in the examination hall. They think that suggesting answers by gestures and symbols is a form of help extended to their friends. They believe it is a form of help when they log in proxy for their classmates using their user-ID and Passwords for doing their assignments. 

The lesson given by Ramu's father to young Krishna is even more relevant today. Each one should carry his own burden. There are no short cuts in life. Such help does more harm indeed. Yes, we should remember that "He shall carry his own burden".

Two Grandfathers; two approaches

She was quietly sitting there, watching her daughter taking part in the parade at school held on the occasion of "Grandparents Day". There were about 50 children in the parade and there were parents as well as grandparents. The parade concluded and all visitors moved to the area serving refreshments. We were on the same table now, sharing cup cakes and fruits. "Did your grandparents also attend such an event when you were in school?", I asked.

She was surprised at the question, but replied with a smile. "There was no celebration of "Grandparents day" in the days when I was in school", she said. After a moment she added, "I wish there was one".

"Do you have any memories of your Grandfather?" was my next question.

"Oh, I have many fond memories of both my granddads", she replied enthusiastically.

"Can you recall any of them?", I asked. What she recalled is in her own words.

*****

My maternal grandfather was a well known writer and social worker. He was associated with many organisations working at different levels. He would be busy, attending some event or the other every day. Whenever he was at home, there would a number of visitors. When we visited his house and he was free from all other activities, he had time for us, his grandchildren. He appeared very strict in his dealings with others and initially we were not very free with him. As we started growing up, we understood him better. He always dressed in white and was simple in his habits. He was also a very good speaker. When he spoke in the meetings and functions, there would be pin drop silence. As kids we did not understand what all he spoke, but it made us feel happy. His way of life taught us discipline in our daily lives. Towards the latter part of our association with him, we were more relaxed and played with him. 

He was a good cards player and allowed us to play with him. Children being associated with a card game was not liked in those days, but his view was different. He was firm in his conviction that any game on its own is not bad at all. It becomes bad only when betting and wagers were allowed to creep in. He held a view that playing cards sharpens one's brain and is good for growing children. Rules to be followed during the game were announced at the beginning and we were taught to follow the rules strictly. It was difficult to win while playing with him. But occasionally we won a game and it made us very happy. We later realised that at times he would deliberately let go a card needed by us to enable us to win a game. 

My paternal grandfather was a teacher and lived in a distant place. We saw him when we visited his place or when he visited us. He was a master storyteller and had a story for every occasion. There was never a dull moment when he was around. He had a joke or anecdote for all seasons. He was comfortable with any age group. Once I cooked a meal and served him. I wanted to know how he felt about it. I knew it was not like what my mother or my grandmother cooked. He silently had the meal and did not say anything. I was excited and asked him about his assessment of my cooking. "You have passed in first class. I gave you 60 per cent marks", he said. "When will I get more marks?", I asked. "You keep on improving and you will get higher marks", he said. With the urge to get better marks I took more interest in cooking. Once he gave me 90 marks and I was very happy. "Grandpa, when will I get hundred per cent?", I asked. " The maximum you get is 90 percent. Your mother gets 95 per cent.  Full marks are only for your grandmother!", he said smilingly.  

He taught me some popular games played in the villages. One of them was "HuliGhatta" or "Tiger and the goats". There were four tigers and goats used in the game. The goats have to restrict the movement of tigers to win. Tiger has to jump and kill goats to win. He would always win, irrespective of whether we chose to be tigers or goats. Once I told him that my other grandfather let go cards to enable us to win. "I want you to win on your own without any outside support. With practice you will win one day against me as well. Concentrate and practice hard. You will succeed", he said. He added mischievously, "If I let you win once, it will be easy for you thereafter. Once you start winning, you will never play with me!" 

*****

"Which of the two approaches was better, allowing you to win occasionally or making you win on your own?", I asked.

She thought for a moment and replied. "I feel both approaches were good in their own way. One believed in a small dose of encouragement to motivate to do better. The other approach taught that nothing came easy and one has to strive hard to achieve anything in life. I have learnt from both approaches and use it alternately to suit the occasions."

As we moved into the parking lot to board our respective cars, she looked back and said, "The two approaches were the two faces of the same coin. Weren't they?"

Instead of replying her question, I smiled and said: "Your grandson or granddaughter may give you full marks for cooking!"

I tend to agree with her view that both approaches of the grandfathers were two faces of the same coin.  Do you?   

One story; many lessons

One hundred young boys and girls (or men and women) were waiting for the chief guest to address them. All in their early twenties, they had assembled in the hall looking forward to a bright career in a premier bank of the country.  One of the General Managers of the bank had arrived from the bank's head office to welcome them to the bank's family. He inaugurated their training program and covered various issues of interest to the future bankers during his inaugural address.  He guided them through his inaugural speech, encouraged them to follow the path of hard work and dedication, cautioned them about the possible pitfalls and assured them of all support of the bank in their positive endeavors.  He concluded his speech with a story.  The true story he recalled was an indicator to the abundant opportunities they get to help other members of the society, during their journey in the bank.

The story he mentioned was about two young students of Stanford University in the year 1892.  One of the students was an orphan and was continuing his studies with lot of difficulties.  They had no money to pay their fees to the college.  The two students came up with an idea to arrange a musical concert in their campus.  They thought that the funds raised by sale of tickets would pay off the artiste and the surplus would meet their fee and other expenses.  Ignacy J Paderewski was a famous pianist at that time and was traveling in the United States.  The artiste's fee for the concert was fixed at 2,000 US Dollars.  Concert was a great success but to their horror the students found that they could raise only 1,600 US Dollars.  They went to Paderewski and gave him cash of 1,600 US Dollars and a check for 400 US Dollars.  They told him that the check would not be paid now, but they would ensure its payment in due course.  Paderewski did not agree to this suggestion.  He tore up the check and returned the cash.  "Deduct your expenses for the concert, pay your fee and study well", he told them.  In effect, the concert was a free exercise and paved the way for their fee payment.

Paderewski was a great pianist as well as a great human being.  He later evolved into a composer, politician and spokesperson for Polish Independence.  World War One (1914-1918) resulted in heavy destruction of life and property in Europe.  More than 16 million people, including about 7 million civilians, were killed.  Poland was one of the worst affected areas and was severely ravaged.  During the year 1919, Paderewski was appointed as the Prime Minister of Poland and he also doubled up as the Minister of Foreign Affairs.   He had a major problem on hand.  The war had destroyed all infrastructure and he had more than 1.5 million hungry people to feed with absolutely no money or other resources.  He decided to approach the "US Food and Relief Administration" for help.  The administration had certain problems but they were overcome.  Thousands of tons of food grains were shipped to Poland and the menace of hunger was contained.  Hundreds of kitchen were established to feed children, expectant mothers and the general public.  Shipments of condensed milk, wheat and flour continued to arrive till the crisis was averted.

Once the major problem was solved, Paderewski waned to personally thank the head of "US Food and Relief Administration".  He crossed the Atlantic and arrived in the United States.  He met the Chairman of the USFRA and thanked him for the support.  "You need not thank me Mr. Prime Minister.  I learnt the lesson of helping others from you.  You might have forgotten me.  I am one of the students you helped at Stanford 27 years ago!" said the Chairman of USFRA.  His name was Herbert Hoover.

*****     

Herbert Hoover was a Engineer by profession and after his stint in USFRA, he became the Commerce Secretary during 1921-28.  He was elected as the 31st President of the United States and served during 1929-33.  There is a blog post titled "Magnificent Hoover Dam" wherein I have mentioned about our visit to the dam in 2005 and the contributions of Herbert Hoover for construction of this dam.  It can be read by CLICKING HERE.  Herbert Hoover made many remarkable contributions during his tenure as Commerce Secretary as well as President.  The headquarters of the United States Department of Commerce building in Washington DC is named as "Herbert Hoover Building".

Paderewski made his first piano concert in Vienna in 1887.  His concerts in Paris (1889) and London (1990) made him extremely popular.  he represented Poland in Paris Peace Conference in 1919, after the first World War.  He also served as the Chief of the National Council of Poland between 1939 and 1941.  He is said to have been very witty and disciplined.  He would stop his performance if someone among the audience talked during his concert and say "I am sorry to interrupt your conversation.  I will resume after you are finished".  It is said that once he was introduced to a polo player and mentioned that they were both masters in their respective fields, though very different.  He replied that there was not much of a difference.  He said, "You are a dear soul who plays Polo.  I am a poor pole who plays solo"!

*****  

There could be many lessons from this true story.  I found these:

• Help someone in need, if you can.
• Do not look to only material benefits in life.  There is more to life than material things.
• Do not forget favors received.
• Do not forget to thank those who helped in the past.
• Repay your debt to the society.
• Of course, any help rendered must not deprive some other deserving person.

There may be other lessons too.  They can be added and the list can be enlarged.